We keep her off social media and I visited them only once since she was born, but she stayed home with my wife. My school only put the photos up a week ago and my dad was really upset. AITA for not telling my dad about an award I was getting in school? If we went hiking or fishing, they had to come, if we went to the movies, had dinner outside or anything, they had to come. Aita for not telling my dad about an award made. We hate it, especially my wife who has purposefully not visited them since 2017. I can talk and read lips but I'm often left out of their conversations. He tries but his choice was made when he moved and my opinion on that is unchanging. I told him I wasn't trying to hurt him but that I was never going to have that relationship he wants after he left me to be with "his family" and that all choices have consequences which he and my mom taught me and that he is now living with his, in that his daughter doesn't want a relationship with him anymore.
No one in my family keeps in touch with me anyway so I didn't see a reason to volunteer any information to them. I just feel like an ungrateful Asshole right now. He's a narcissist who has always treated me poorly and my family enables his bad behavior. They blamed my wife because they think that she controls me, which is not true at all. Aita for not telling my dad about an award called. ETA: They paid for my brother's apartment and living expenses when he was in college. Julia and I'll be graduating this summer, I got an early acceptance to my college of choice and when I told my parents, both decided to do something to celebrate.
Submitted 1 year ago by ReadingTop3083. I told him what was the point, that his choice was made 9 years ago that they were more important and my life didn't involve them anymore. Yet my family still reveres him as a smart and capable person. My mom and I will be having a getaway weekend to the spa and my dad said he would take me to the beach. I'm this medicore girl who struggled through a CS degree. We have a healthy bank account, we travel a lot and we're ready to buy a nice house but we're waiting for the housing market to cool down. They still paid a portion of his fees and his living expense for the four years. He went on about him being my dad and deserving to know and how proud he was, etc, and why couldn't I see, why was I out to hurt him. He told me he had to be with his family and that them staying was not an option. My dad found out via Facebook about the award. They think that we're both stupid and incapable of anything just because we can't hear.
I have faded from him over time. He is the perfect son every parent would have wanted to have. They accused me of denying my daughter a family that could've helped raise her in many different ways. So now on to the issue: my wife and I have a 2-year-old daughter. My dad was remarried at the time, had three stepkids. We're in our 30s, and they still treat us like children. They may have a point.
I could feel my eyes burning and I told him that this wasn't the deal, he tried to convince me but he ended up leaving with her. He works odd jobs, he has unstable relationships and he regularly mooches off people. That regardless of how I feel he has a right to know. I won't lie, I really enjoyed it, I could really talk with my dad, do fun stuff and be around him without having to wait for my stepbrothers to stop talking to him or anything. Both my wife and I are deaf. Growing up they only did the bare minimum: fed me, clothed me, made small talk but they never actually tried to get to know me or do anything beyond that. It wouldn't be healthy for her to be around people who constantly disrespect her parents. So he moved with them and then I went from seeing him all the time to seeing him for a few weeks in the summer. Over the years they attempted to make it appealing for me to live with them. As for my mom I explained her everything and after much crying from both parts, she apologized and hugged me because she didn't know. My dad sent a long text and told me that I would have gotten something better if I had studied harder.
My (17F) parents divorced ten years ago because my dad cheated on my mom. My dad found out about this last week, but I got the award at the start of May. I only speak to him during court mandated times, and I don't see him unless I absolutely have to. My dad always liked my brother more. I hope I've given enough context. Saying I'd have "siblings" all the time and how great it was there and stuff. I told him that it wasn't as he didn't even know what I liked to buy something I would like and I was getting way less than my brother got as always. I was honestly really excited so I offered to pay for the hotel reservation because I wanted to feel mature (lo) my dad said no a bunch of times but I ended up convincing him.
They never bothered to get to know my wife either. That's another reason I keep them at arm's length. I also informed my dad that since he keeps hurting me and putting his other family above what I explicitly ask him for then I would rather go NC with him and that he was currently uninvited to my graduation. Despite all that, my family thinks that my wife's family takes care of us, i. e. help out financially, manage our finances and walk us through everyday tasks like buying groceries or paying bills.
He probably spend more than 25, 000 dollars on his graduation. And if she turned out deaf (she didn't), they wouldn't treat her with respect either. In my rage, I called the hotel to cancel the room and I didn't told my dad. My dad didn't even want to go out with me. She's supporting my decision. I remember I used to cry at night because I couldn't understand. My dad did asked about inviting her and I said no. He doesn't have his life together. My older brother is not deaf and he's very close with my whole family. But again he said no. I mean, I kinda get it. They didn't even learn sign language for me. My brother somehow found out about my daughter's existence a few weeks ago.
ETA: As someone suggested I'm adding this, the trip with my dad and the spa getaway with my mom was because I got an early acceptance nor because I was graduating high school, that why Julia had no business being there. I told him he could stay for me. So I never told them about my daughter. His oldest stepkids dad was moving for work and she wanted to move with him, and the courts said that she could. I'm starting to wonder if my wife and I are selfish for keeping our daughter from a big family full of cousins her age because we have our own hang-ups about them.